Newf Brand Notes

Dear Ayla,

I saw your website and was wondering if you could help me. My wife sports a full bush that she doesn’t want to shave or wax. At one point about a year ago she used an electric razor and gave herself “buzzcut”. She said it was very uncomfortable during sex and stopped after a couple of buzzes.

BTW I shave with the electric razor and find being clean shaven to be very pleasurable. She says waxing is very painful and won’t entertain the thought.

I would very much like her to shave/wax but am getting nowhere. It’s frustrating on my end but she doesn’t seem to want to experiment. I also don’t want her to get in a tizzy and cut out our sex life. We have been married for 18 years.

I think that the problem is that once she got the buzzcut it was uncomfortable and she just lost interest in the whole thing. She doesn’t want to try going bare figuring it will still be uncomfortable (a landing strip or some other funky shape would be fine with me).

Any help you can give me would be appreciated. I have thought about mixing it in with foreplay but never quite figured the best approach. I wish that there was some way to make it her idea since she is a very self directed person.

Wishing for the Shaved Life

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Hi Wishing,Your problem is a common one, for couples of all ages. There is often one person in a relationship who wants their partner to shave or wax, which predominately seems to be a man wanting his woman to shave. But from what we’ve heard, the guy usually doesn’t want to shave or trim himself so you are ahead of the competition there.

Waxing can be very painful as this is an extremely sensitive part of the body. I do have some friends who’ve tried it and said that it’s really only uncomfortable for the first couple tugs until your endorphins get going. That’s of course aside from revealing yourself to a stranger – but if she’s not uncomfortable at the gyno’s office, it shouldn’t be any more uncomfortable at a waxing salon.

I personally just go the fully shaved route. We’ve got a complete guide to shaving for women which we developed while reflecting on our everyday shaves so perhaps reading this might give her a few ideas if she wants to try something other than the electric razor.

Perhaps your wife feels too virginal being completely shaved? Maybe she’d prefer a landing strip or some funky shape instead on her mound and would be willing to just shave the lips? We’ve got a collection of pubic hair shaving templates with over 80 different shapes in case she’s interested in this idea.

Ultimately, the decision has to be your wife’s. I’m assuming you’ve expressed your thoughts and feelings about wanting her to pursue a new hair style so there really is little you can do without really pressing it. If she doesn’t like the way a shaved mound looks or doesn’t feel comfortable going bare (or even just partially bare), all the arguments in the world probably will not change her mind. As I mentioned before, you may be able to find some sort of middle ground about shapes or the amount of hair she shaves or trims which is pleasing to you both.

Have you suggested doing the shaving together, as a sort of foreplay? This might make it more appealing to her and could lead to much more fun ultimately.

If the game route isn’t appealing, you could try purchasing some small, sexy underwear or lingerie for her.

But like I said before, if she’s completely shut herself down to the idea, there may be little you can do aside from admitting defeat. But if she trusts you enough to experiment on other fronts, perhaps she will also give shaving another chance. Just try not to force the subject or bring it up too often; this could end up having a very undesired effect and make her resent the idea altogether. I guess patience and understanding are important to keep in mind.

Our product, Venereous Mountain Mist, was created to help eliminate the itching, little red bumps and razor burn that often accompany shaving. It’s all natural and has ingredients like aloe vera to moisturize the skin, witch hazel to stop bleeding and prevent infection and silk protein & vitamin E to keep the skin smooth and soft. Perhaps she may find that this helps reduce some of the irritation if she does try some sort of grooming again. Our other shaving products, Venereous Shaving Oil & Venereous Shaving Jelly, are also developed to reduce nicks and moisturize skin while giving you a clean, close shave. All the best & happy shaving!

Ayla

P.S. I wrote a few more details about this subject in my full response here.